Think about a five-year old starting school.
When you start school, they make you sit down all day to learn some things. And YOU have to be good at that OR at the end of the year, get embarrassed because your marks are not good enough.
Not many places in that school either say:
Are you enjoying this?
Would you like to do something different?
Are there other things you like doing?
Maybe you feel like playing right now.
You go ALL the way through school studying hard.
Because every few months? They test you.
And at the end of the year, they test you.
You're competing against all the other kids.
You’ve got to study hard and get good marks every time to at least pass, if not top the class.
(Though topping the class and maintaining your spot must be the standard for being called an achiever).
You spend ALL this time ratcheting and ratcheting yourself up. So by the time you get to be an adult?
ALL you’ve been trained to do is work.
You think about:
I need to get better.
I need to be successful.
I’m going to be measured.
I need to stay on top of my game.
I will be compared.
And if I don’t meet the standards,
then that means I’m not good enough,
Or WORSE, maybe, I’m just… terrible.
All or nothing gets you all or nothing.
Still, however, these high-achieving parts of us are amazing – they helped us get to where we are now.
But now as an adult, there are a lot of other areas in your life you need to give airtime as well.
You also have to spend time with the people you love, do the things that serve parts of you that need freedom and rest and tender loving care.
The hardest work is knowing when to take a break.
Need help with that?
Love and light,
The SMP Coaching Team